Tuesday, October 14, 2008


Elections, the economy, personal issues, work. What does it all mean? What does it all mean in my life?
Sometimes I feel as though I am living someone else's life. I should not be here, why am I here?.
I was born in a small village in Mexico that still stands with plenty of people in it. People that wake up, go about their daily chores,and feed themselves somehow. They die, they laugh, they cry the same as everyone else. Since I left that village, plenty of US presidential elections have come and gone, the market has dipped or gone down plenty as well; and that village still stands with the same people going through the same motions as they were 20, 30 years ago and perhaps even longer.
They did not have a housing bubble or worry about the price of gas. Maybe they worried about rain and or the lack of it which is more damaging for their crops. I do not think that they expect a bail out from their state government or federal government. Maybe a hand out from their relative living in "El Norte", but never from the government. If there is not food, they just do not eat, or maybe a neighbor or family member will help.
That could have been my life.
I could have also stayed in Mexico City where it would not have been as simple as in the village. It wasn't. I lived there plenty and was happy as well, not without some minor heartache. As Stitch (From Lilo and Stitch) said,"We were a broken family." I did not have a happy childhood according to most therapists or psychologists. According to them, I should have died at about my mid twenties; and did have friends that fit the profile and did not make it past 20 or 25. I considered myself happy regardless and made the best of it.
That is perhaps why I find myself where I am right now. I always sought a better way. A better something.
Somehow I landed in L.A. Another metropolis just like Mexico City, perhaps not as corrupt but still sinfull.
So much has happened that determined where I am today. many things that I did not have control over. Some of them I did. I have made some bad choices and decisions. I have also been lucky with the people I have met.
So I guess when you add app all the steps in my life, they have all led to where I am now.
I have very few regrets, but I am very happy where I am.

1 comment:

Ms. Marie said...

It makes my heart smile to know that you are very happy where you are in your life. I am too. I love you so very much. I am glad that I was lead toward you...I love you.